On the Path

I don't know where I'm going, and where I've been might be revisionist history.

I don't know who I am, in this moment, but feel pulls of who I want to be.

I don't know when it will happen, but I have trust that it will.

I don't know how I came to this place, at this time, but believe I'm exactly where I need to be.

I don't know what it will be like or look like, but feel it will be more beautiful than I can imagine.

As I was re-organizing my home office during the last month, I found a slip of paper with the above writing inscribed on it. The paper was dated September 13, 2012. I had to peel back a number of layers in my memory to discover where I was when I wrote this. Photos helped me recall I was in New Hampshire, on Squam Lake, attending an art retreat. As I read this over now, nearly 9 years later, I am a bit awe-struck. These words, my words, still reverberate and resonate with me today. 

I'm still on the path -- of coming home to myself. My true Self. And that journey isn't always clear, but I keep following it, taking the next step and then the next. With trust and belief that I am right where I need to be in each and every moment. Following my intuition and the internal pulls to cultivate the life I am meant to be living. I could never have predicted nearly a decade ago the events that have transpired since that September. I would have been shocked to even imagine that I would be divorced from my first husband. That I would resign from my tenured faculty position at the university. That my arms would be covered in beautiful tattoos. Those ideas would have seemed ludicrous to me. Yet, here I am. A full-time therapist. A workshop and retreat leader. A yoga teacher. A holistic healer carving out this path of Love Warrior Healing and beyond. And while I still don't know exactly where I'm going, I trust each and every step I am taking, And I KNOW it will be more beautiful than I imagined. It already is.